Meet Phil Part 1

10:05] Piter: havi
[10:06] Piter: Stop eating my sesame cake.
[10:06] miss havisham: Hmm?
[10:06] miss havisham: Phil and I don't eat cake. Not to worry.
[10:06] Everybody: You... you what?
[10:07] Everybody: CAKE. IS LIFE.
[10:07] miss havisham: Not now that I have Phil. I have to take care of him.
[10:07] miss havisham: He likes yogurt.
[10:08] miss havisham: He's afraid of sweets.
[10:08] Piter likes yogurt.
[10:09] Everybody: Whoever Phil is, he sucks. Give me his dessert.
[10:10] miss havisham: He is my BFF and I never go anywhere without him.
[10:10] Everybody scratches his head. Is this a vibrator?
[10:10] miss havisham: But you can have our cake. And cookies.
[10:10] miss havisham: No, Phil is my filling :(
[10:10] Everybody: Is this Phil McCracken, the dentist/porn star?
[10:11] Everybody: Oh, God.
[10:11] Everybody stares up at heaven. "Please, please. Make it rain in the desert. I think she's getting delirious."
[10:11] Everybody: Look, I know it's not unusual for small children to have bizarre imaginary friends.
[10:12] miss havisham: He's not imaginary. Wanna see?
[10:12] Everybody: But the idea of an imaginary male friend that is bonded to your teeth just makes me assume child abuse.