It's the little things

Everybody: Hell yes, 4 days without functional drains is OVERR.

Everybody: BRB, flushing my toilet 15 times.

Everybody: NO MORE SHITTING IN THE YARD! -hic-

Gregonzola: Okay, dude. You don't have to yell. I'll stop shitting in your yard. -hic-

Everybody: If you were a vegetarian, it'd be different.

Gregonzola: 'Cause vegetarian shit doesn't stink. If you doubt that, ask one of them. -hic-

Ramone: haha

Shoo86: lol gergs

The Shoohorn

Shoo86: one time i was on a delivery

Shoo86: i used to deliver appliances

Shoo86: and these people werent home

Everybody: Custom kitchen delivies?

Shoo86: but their daughter was home from college and having a pool party

Ramone: I saw this porno -hic-

Shoo86: i kept thinking how it would make a great plot for a porno

Ramone: haha

Shoo86: it was her and like 4 of her friends

Shoo86: 0 dudes

Shoo86: except for me and jeff

Shoo86: lol

Miss Havisham: Dear Penthouse:

Gregonzola: Shoo's porn name: The Shoohorn.

Ramone: HA!

Gregonzola: The Shoohorn and Jeff Deliver a Stove

Miss Havisham: "Oh, it's a tight fit!"

Shoo86: it was a refrigerator

Gregonzola: "My parents aren't home, but my friends and I need help. Can you put it right here?"

Shoo86: haha

Shoo86: it was tight fit

How to Know you Need a New Roommate

Shoo86: maybe ill just play porko

Gregonzola: Play word realms!

Everybody: F U!

Gregonzola: Yes, please.

Gregonzola: I much prefer fucking to working.

Shoo86: lol

Everybody: Huh. Sometimes it IS work.

Everybody: You now know what I do for a living, I guess.

Gregonzola: Pooch Productions Presents:

Everybody rolls that beautiful behind footage.

Gregonzola: In cooperation with Vivid Entertainment

Gregonzola: Pajama Party VI: Revenge of the Sluts

Everybody: What was that one.

Shoo86: haha

Everybody: "Popcorn Party for Pussy"

Gregonzola: No idea. I'm making this crap up.

Everybody: Or something like that.

Gregonzola: Haha.

Everybody: It was faux-cheerleader- porn.

Gregonzola: I know Vivid is real, I helped them file something.

Everybody: In that nice "ohhh, I've never done a girl before" kind of way.

Miss Havisham: i once walked into my living room and found Friendly Fuckers Vol. 8 in my VCR

Everybody: And then they blow the suspension of disbelief in the final few scenes. And I was like "Really? Assholes."

Miss Havisham: That was about the time I told my husband we needed to get rid of our roommate

Shoo86 runs 248 turns of porko

Gregonzola: FF Vol 8?

Gregonzola: What won't they think of next?

Everybody: What is.. porko?

Everybody: Err. "Friendly Fuckers". Why is that not our clan name? -hic-

I like Chinese

Shoo86: ok lunch break

Shoo86: brb

Gregonzola: He's heating up a hot pocket right now.

Thomas Earl Waldrop II: Mmm. Processed pizzafood substitute.

Gregonzola: Omnorm.

Shoo86: back

Shoo86: i had leftover chinese

Shoo86: and she brought me lunch!

How to be Gangsta

Thomas Earl Waldrop II: Last night I was really drunk and tried to say funny things about attractive women.

Gregonzola: Hey, that's a good deal. Attractive women may not respond, but it's still fun.

Thomas Earl Waldrop II: There was this really cute blonde and I told the bartender that I vanted to "beat that pussy up like a Phil Collins drum breakdown." -hic-

Thomas Earl Waldrop II: I was trying to be gangsta.

Gregonzola: Phil Collins is very gangsta.

Thomas Earl Waldrop II: I concur.

Shoo is Optimal

Ria: Shoo, go fetch me awesome stuff under the Sea ;)

Shoo86: haha

Shoo86: i think its easier to buy that stuff

Shoo86: than to fetch it

Shoo86: castlefarm the meat and then buy it

Ria: meh, more fun to fetch!

Shoo86: fun is not optimal
jesabele: YOU'RE NOT OPTIMAL

Shoo86: actually i am

Shoo86: jes you wouldnt know optimal if it bit you on the ass

Clan goes Girl-on-Girl

Miss Havisham logged on.

Miss Havisham: hey everybody, and everybody else

Ria: HAVI!

Miss Havisham: ria!!

Shoo86: hey havi

Ria glomps Havi and squeezes her boobs.

Miss Havisham: girl-on-girl action today in /clan

Shoo86: gergs, camera

Camera rolling, of course.