Thom's Art

 For those who hadn't heard, Thomas Earl Waldrop II passed away. He did leave us some art, and it is quality.

This first one is Jesabele's though. It captures the spirit of one of our friends who no longer plays.

Jesa's hymen will kick your butt

 [11:45] jesABeLE: whut iz hymen and how 2?

[11:46] KrakMunky69: it's something you haven't had in a loooooong time jesa
[11:46] jesABeLE: ooooooh
[11:46] jesABeLE: should I be missing it?
[11:47] JayRandom logged on.
[11:47] KrakMunky69: nah, all it does is hinder your enjoyment of life
[11:49] JayRandom: Also whose hindering my enjoyment of life?
[11:49] JayRandom: Or who's. You know.
[11:49] jesABeLE: apparently my hymen did, Jay
[11:50] Myanide: jesa's hymen will kick yoru ass
[11:51] JayRandom: What is a hymen and hoe2?

Peeverb

[newbie] Leeverb has an accident.

[newbie] Ramone points and laughs
[newbie] SomebodyElse snickers @ leeverb
[newbie] BioHazardMan: PeeVerb.
[clan] Ramone has an accident.
[newbie] Ramone: the weird thing is I signed off like 5 minutes ago
[newbie] Reiko Ishikawa: Computer gremlins
[newbie] Dr_Oblvious: That's a lot of lag, Ramone.
[newbie] Predalien has an accident.
[newbie] JRR Trollkien has an accident.
[newbie] Ramone: ragepee
[newbie] Adamantois points and laughs at verb
[newbie] hAm sAlAd sAndwicH puts on a hazmat suit
[newbie] Reiko Ishikawa giggles and tucks her feet up
[newbie] Ramone: none of those accounts are online
[newbie] jesabele tears up from laughter

Yilf in Hell

[14:48] fantabulous: Yeah. Beyond the "Yiff in hell" or "How many dogs have you fucked?" comments, I don't see the big deal about mentioning that one is a furry.
[14:49] kashieda: I read that as "Yilf in hell"
[14:50] Gregonzola: I did, too. -hic-
[14:52] jesabele: I read it the same
[14:52] Gregonzola: From the makers of Breaking Bad comes a new series.
[14:52] Gregonzola: About an innocent girl facing a less-than-innocent situation.
[14:52] kashieda: Good Bonings?
[14:52] Gregonzola: YILF IN HELL
[14:52] Gregonzola: I think Yilf may be asexual.
[14:53] Gregonzola: I'm not even sure she has a vagina.
[14:53] Gregonzola: And please, if anyone's sure don't tell me.
[14:56] Gregonzola: And all goes silent again. I'm just engaging in chatsturbation here.
[14:57] kashieda: you are
[14:57] Everybody: Yilf is not asexual.
[14:57] kashieda: and then we come
[14:57] Gregonzola: Dammit, Pooch.

Oh, just put that anywhere

[13:44] jesabele: I don't even know what you are talking about but I have a wide variety of preferences
[13:45] miss havisham: well, was talking about food but go ahead and take it another place if you like
[13:50] jesabele: "go ahead and take it another place if you like." I have said that before

Unicorns, Whoring and Lady Liberty

[12:17] Gregonzola: Kash, "Unicorns" is clan slang now for orgasms resulting from intercourse not involving stimulation of the clitoris. Jesa had a BF who could make her climax without clitoral interaction. Now (quite understandably) no other male measures up.
[12:18] kashieda: aaaahhhh
[12:18] kashieda: that sounds like FUN
[12:19] Gregonzola: I'm sure it is. I don't have a vagina or clitoris to test out how fun, but I'm willing to believe her.
[12:19] kashieda: well, was fun for jesa, but not so much now?
[12:19] kashieda: yeah
[12:21] Gregonzola: Well, the male in question took up with another lady. But it's okay, because Jesa may have a way to win him back in time. And hence once again corral her unicorns.
[12:22] kashieda: sneaky
[12:23] kashieda: what should i do now?
[12:23] kashieda: dread is dead
[12:23] kashieda: 97 adventures to spend
[12:26] Gregonzola: Practice making unicorns.
[12:26] kashieda: i always do that
[12:32] Gregonzola: Good man.
[12:37] kashieda: should i "old man" ship adventure?
[12:38] Everybody: Do you ever have those moments where you jump up from your chair and assume the victorious 'Statue of Liberty' pose?
[12:38] Everybody: Because, FUCK YES! FROM SEA TO SHINING ME!
[12:38] kashieda: no, not really
[12:39] kashieda: well, if our dread is goind to stay boring, i'll go whore out a bit
[12:39] kashieda: see ya
[12:41] jesabele: UNICORNS
[12:42] Gregonzola: WHORING!
[12:47] Everybody: WHORNICORNS. -hic-
[12:47] Everybody: Wait, this sounds like an event that krak would attend: "Whornicon 9!" 

Super Lethargic

[11:59] jesabele: I am super lethargic
[12:02] Gregonzola: That's like normal lethargic, but with a cape.
[12:07] kashieda: nah, it doesn't have the energy to get a cape
[12:07] kashieda: it was going to, but meh

Marriage Equality

[11:38] jesabele: I don't want to use it, I just want a black box
[11:41] Big Daddy Grimm: and that right there is the arguement that won us the right for women to marry women

Marriage Equality

[11:38] jesabele: I don't want to use it, I just want a black box
[11:41] Big Daddy Grimm: and that right there is the argument that won us the right for women to marry women

Niaga yad nrop yag

[12:32] RAMONE logged on.
[12:32] jesabele: GET OUT
[12:32] MafOOsalah: AND IN AND OUT
[12:33] RAMONE: penisbutt
[12:35] jesabele: NO U
[12:36] RAMONE: asspenisbutt
[12:36] MafOOsalah: RamOne in the AssButt.
[12:37] miss havisham: oh my. it's gay porn day in one sec again! yay!
[12:37] RAMONE: gay porn is nrop yag backwards

Shittin' on the Ritz

[13:10] Everybody: Being the tactile type, I momentarily taste shit whenever I think things like that.
[13:17] Gregonzola: I've never tasted shit yet. I try to avoid it. I know at some point some kid's going to flick some in my mouth or an animal will, but so far I've been lucky
[13:17] Gregonzola: So, I don't know how it tastes.
[13:18] Gregonzola: As an anosmic, I'd probably have an atypical experience anyway.
[13:18] Gregonzola: "Huh, this shit isn't so bad."
[13:18] jesabele: ew
[13:18] Gregonzola: It's only conjecture, Jesa dear. I haven't tried it.
[13:18] Everybody hands Grego some crackers and a butterknife.
[13:18] Gregonzola: Haha!
[13:19] fantabulous: Shittin on the ritz.
[13:19] fantabulous: Do do do do do do.

Pee and Jesa

[13:10] Everybody: Pee kills bacteria.
[13:11] Gregonzola: I think pee is actually just aseptic, not antiseptic, which is why UTIs can happen.
[13:11] Everybody: Ahh. You know, I expect whatever the active beastie is in UTIs is just more acid-resistant than most.
[13:11] Shoo86: and its not even really aseptic
[13:11] Shoo86: but yes, greg
[13:12] Everybody: So, I propose an experiment.
[13:12] Everybody: Someone get me a UTI culture.
[13:12] Everybody: I'm going to take 3 mason jars and fill them with fluids at different pHs.
[13:12] Everybody: I have a little magnetic stirring plate thingy, even! Woofun!
[13:12] Gregonzola: This sounds like a good time. I'm coming over. I'll bring Jesa.
[13:12] Everybody: We will need a temperature control.. I've got a few little home-mdae incubators.. never tried to get them up to bodytemp, but we'll see.
[13:13] Everybody: How about you just come over Jesa? That's a good time.
[13:13] Gregonzola: Okay, can do.
[13:13] Shoo86: whats the experiment exactly? lol
[13:13] Everybody: Oh, we're seeing what pH range the infectious agent in a UTI prefers.
[13:13] Gregonzola: Oh, Shoo's fancy. He wants you to formalize a hypothesis.
[13:13] Gregonzola: Good experiment. Let's do it.
[13:13] Everybody: This is really just an excuse to get Jesa and urine together.
[13:13] Everybody: (Shh!)

Fish Tacos

[11:25] Gregonzola: I do love a good fish taco.
[11:25] jesabele: have not had one is a long time
[11:26] jesabele: in fact, the last time I had fish tacos I could only eat one...
[11:26] jesabele: I fail at life, obviously
[11:26] Everybody: I thought you were the drunk-receiving- bisexual only.
[11:27] Everybody: I didn't think you ate "fish tacos" at all?
[11:27] jesabele: I don't munch box, if that is what you are implying
[11:28] RAMONE: he was implying that you don't
[11:28] RAMONE: post pix to prove it
[11:30] jesabele: I am surprised there isn't a picture of me eating fish tacos
[11:31] Piter totally doesn't have that picture. Totally.
[11:34] Gregonzola: IIRC, Jesa does not eat box, and also isn't comfortable with other ladies eating her box.
[11:34] Gregonzola: So no pictures for you perverts.
[11:34] Piter: preverts
[11:35] Everybody: Trueverts.
[11:36] Gregonzola: They don't believe you, Jesa.
[11:36] RAMONE: pics anyway
[11:36] Gregonzola: Just link us a picture of your box. When they see there's no one munching it right now, they'll believe it.
[11:37] RAMONE: ^
[11:37] Gregonzola: She'll be back in a sec, guys. She's photographing her taco.
[11:39] Gregonzola: It's also important to preserve it for the historical record. "This is what Jesa's place looked like before the Great Gang Bang of New Year's Eve 2013."
[11:39] RAMONE: same as before last year's, same as after
[11:40] RAMONE: Anyone ever been to Rome?
[11:40] RAMONE: The ruins there come to mind
[11:40] Gregonzola: Heh.
[11:41] RAMONE: One majestic, now ancient, crumbling, pillaged over the years
[11:41] RAMONE: But still attracting thousands of sightseers a year
[11:41] Everybody: I'll take "Your Mother" for $1000, Trebeq.

That changes things

[12:25] jesabele: you are not allowed to leave
[12:26] Piter: I do what I want
[12:26] Piter: I answer to no one.
[12:26] Everybody: What about for $30?

You're going to want an otter box if you do that

[14:29] fantabulous: I've never had sex with a phone. Is it recommended?
[14:29] Gregonzola: Fanta, depends.
[14:30] zweitracht: Depends on the phone.
[14:30] jesabele: depends on the vibrate function

Money Shots

[13:31] zweitracht: I do get free homebrew because of his influence, though.
[13:31] zweitracht: So, points for him.
[13:31] Gregonzola: He has now tipped the balance way in his favor.
[13:32] jesabele: wait, you are concerned about letting me handle flames and drugs? [No, Jesa, we aren't]
[13:32] miss havisham: i want free homebrew. where do you meet these husbands?
[13:32] miss havisham: craigslist ad in the Havi 4 Homebrew Husbands category?
[13:32] zweitracht: Via their wives.
[13:33] Piter: yes. I don't want to burn to death when you LIGHT MY TOWN ON FIRE
[13:33] zweitracht: How do I meet their wives? Now that, THAT, is a whole 'nother story.
[13:33] Gregonzola: Pooch has a secret Glamor Shots business on the side.
[13:33] Gregonzola: He calls it "Money Shots."
[13:33] zweitracht: But it involves hotels ,booze, and their wives' mothers.
[13:33] zweitracht: I'm glad someone else went there for me. -hic-

Time for a Mashup

[12:30] jesabele: I will bitch about you finishing faster than I expected
[13:37] MasterSilex: was that too quick?
[13:39] jesabele: Shoo, we have got to work on your control 

Shoo's Romantic Window

[12:33] MasterSilex: oh havi i finished the goatlet in 5 turns
[12:33] miss havisham: .................... ..what
[12:33] miss havisham: WHAT
[12:33] MasterSilex: 3 more turns until my romantic window opens
[12:33] miss havisham: your... romantic... window.
[12:33] MasterSilex: so i dont want to do the outskirts until that starts
[12:33] Piter: he means his anus
[12:33] miss havisham: his anus is on a tight schedule
[12:33] MasterSilex: and i dont wanna waste 2 turns of chorale/thignfinder by starting the nook
[12:34] MasterSilex: so idk what to do
[12:34] jesabele: remember, Shoo, just relax
[12:34] jesabele: ease it in
[12:34] MasterSilex: actually, i guess i could just do the nook anyway
[12:34] Piter: by nook, he also means anus 

Don't disappoint Spiderbox

[12:29] MasterSilex: i wont bitch about finishing faster than i expected
[12:30] jesabele: I will bitch about you finishing faster than I expected

Jesa's box is safe, everyone

[11:57] jesabele: also, pretty sure a spider has been chewing on me while I am sleeping
[12:00] Piter: fucking spiders
[12:01] jesabele: they find me to be particularly tasty
[12:12] miss havisham: hey everyone
[12:12] miss havisham: did i miss anything fantastic yet today while i was idle
[12:12] jesabele: not raelly
[12:15] Gregonzola: You missed Piter: fucking spiders
[12:16] Piter: Pony play's a know go, but sex with a spider?
[12:16] Piter: no go
[12:16] Piter: damn what is WRONG with me today
[12:16] jesabele: the same thing that is wrong with me
[12:16] jesabele: and possibly Havi
[12:16] miss havisham: i bet most spiders would die if fucked by a human
[12:16] miss havisham: so i'm for it.
[12:17] Gregonzola: If you sexed up Jesa's spider, you'd probably fill its book lungs with semen and then it would die of asphyxiation. Aren't you willing to save Jesa with your semen?
[12:17] Gregonzola: Yeah, what Havi said.
[12:17] jesabele: also, there was this theory for awhile that led to me being called Spider Queen and my vagina being the spiderbox
[12:17] MasterSilex: i ate crickets once
[12:18] miss havisham: was it in pasta or tacos, i forget
[12:18] miss havisham: in that same week another friend ate crickets
[12:18] Piter: ...what
[12:18] miss havisham: one of them was pasta and one crickets
[12:18] miss havisham: er, one taco
[12:18] jesabele: see, Havi is right there with us, Piter
[12:19] Gregonzola: Um, tell us abut this theory, Jesa.
[12:19] jesabele: I was still new in black lung
[12:20] jesabele: and one morning I woke up with a hobo spider in my underwear
[12:20] Gregonzola: Um terrifying.
[12:20] jesabele: it didn't bite me, just chilled in my ass crack for who knows how long
[12:20] jesabele: so ExAc started saying I had arachnoginitis
[12:20] Gregonzola: You mesmerized it. It was saying, "Dat ass!"
[12:21] jesabele: and then people started sending me their spider webs
[12:24] jesabele: so for awhile I had the largest collection of them
[12:24] jesabele: and the theory was that the next person to penetrate me would release the eggs 
[12:24] Gregonzola: That's a big incentive not to penetrate you.
[12:24] miss havisham: SCARY
[12:25] jesabele: well, I have been penetrated many times since then
[12:25] Gregonzola: No spiders?
[12:25] jesabele: so unless those spiders need to incubate for more than 5 years I would say it is safe